Marriage a sacred union between two people which even brings two families together. For everlasting and happy relationship there should be equal effort, sacrifice, commitment and responsibility by both husband and wife.
After marriage, a woman has to leave her house and goes with a man and stay together with him and his family. Have you ever wonder why is it like this? Have you ever try to imagine it in a contradict way?
A country like Nepal where the societies are male-dominated and patriarchal it’s normal to watch a girl leaving her house and move to her husband’s home. It is even a part of culture where a father has to do ‘Kanyadan’.
‘Kanya’ means girl and ‘Daan’ means to give which means giving responsibility of her to a man who will further handle or care her daughter as he was caring before her marriage. A girl even has to change her surname and to add her husband’s surname after her name.
Girls have to spend a different life after marriage. They have to follow their husbands wherever they go abandoning her previous place, friends and even family. Patriarchal society has robbed the autonomy of women and reluctantly have to do the things they do not want.
It seems society is cruel to women if not why they can’t decide what to do and where to live after marriage. Both couple have right to decide together but society do not care about women as like men so they have to sacrifice everything and move to a man’s house after marriage.
Is son and parents relationship is more important than daughter-parents relationship? Society has treated daughters like their relationship has no value and special like son-parents relationship.
If a woman wishes to live her husband without his family then society will blame and regard her as a bad daughter-in-law which a man has been doing from the start to now taking a daughter away from her home, parents, friends and even from her dreams but never regarded as bad son-in-law as women.
Unfortunately, even after so much sacrifice women are not appreciated. I don’t to mean to say change the whole system and leave your parents and stay at girl’s home with her family because it won’t balance a thing but you can appreciate your wife what she has done for you.
If you are a woman reading this article be bold enough to stand up for your right. You can discuss with your husband where to live because you both are on the same team. Try to bring both families together.
If you are a man reading this article don’t forget to thank and appreciate your wife for being with you. Appreciate her sacrifice and hard-work. Women are really simple if you understand them, they are even ready to sacrifice her dreams and family to being with you. At least we can do for them is to appreciate and love them.
By Sanam Gurung